GOOD PARENTING
There is no doubt that the most difficult job a person can ever undertake is that of raising children. The advances that have occurred in media and communication coupled with a dramatic change in cultural norms in recent years have made child rearing much more difficult. Children are exposed to many concepts and challenges at younger and younger ages which frustrate parents who are trying to raise children on their terms. Fortunately, there are still some basic strategies that can help raise competent and emotionally healthy children.
Every parent wants their children to develop confidence and self esteem. Unfortunately, it is common for parents to undermine this by micro-managing their children’s world. The common term for this is Helicopter Parent because they are always hovering. Thinking it is what a good parent should do, they are quick to fix any small dilemma for their child. This prevents esteem growth in a child since they are never given an opportunity to accomplish anything on their own. It also sends a message to the child that they must not be a competent person since someone else has to handle everything for them. These messages are exactly the opposite that a good parent wants to give their children!
Discipline is another area where parents often feel they need help. Human babies are born knowing nothing about how to behave. They learn what it means to be human and how to act appropriately through what their parents teach them. Children initially misbehave because they don’t know any better. They continue to misbehave because have been taught that they can. Parents who consider themselves as teachers of appropriate behavior instead of punishment administrators do better.
Proper behavior is taught just like anything else. If you are teaching your child that 2 plus 2 equals 4, you will correct their wrong answers immediately with the right answer. The same goes for misbehavior. Parents should correct their child’s improper behavior consistently and should then have their child practice the behavior they expect.
Teaching proper behavior begins as soon as your child exhibits improper behavior. Remember that they are constantly learning about their world. If you don’t correct their poor choices, they will grow up thinking that there is nothing wrong with how they behave.
Besides loving interaction, the number one need of all young children is stability and consistency. A child experiences a lot of stress if he or she feels there is no one they can depend on for safety and comfort and their behavior will reflect it. Even if a parent has to fake it, they should insure that their child feels secure. That’s why teachers see an inordinate amount of behavior problems from children that have no structure and predictable routine in their lives.
Good parenting requires a huge amount of time and effort. It follows life’s basic rule that the more you put into it, the more you will get out of it. Parents who put in the hard work while their children are small will not have to work nearly as hard when they are older. There is no easy way. If you try to take short cuts, you will see it reflected in your child.
©2010 raise a kid R.I.G.H.T.
Every parent wants their children to develop confidence and self esteem. Unfortunately, it is common for parents to undermine this by micro-managing their children’s world. The common term for this is Helicopter Parent because they are always hovering. Thinking it is what a good parent should do, they are quick to fix any small dilemma for their child. This prevents esteem growth in a child since they are never given an opportunity to accomplish anything on their own. It also sends a message to the child that they must not be a competent person since someone else has to handle everything for them. These messages are exactly the opposite that a good parent wants to give their children!
Discipline is another area where parents often feel they need help. Human babies are born knowing nothing about how to behave. They learn what it means to be human and how to act appropriately through what their parents teach them. Children initially misbehave because they don’t know any better. They continue to misbehave because have been taught that they can. Parents who consider themselves as teachers of appropriate behavior instead of punishment administrators do better.
Proper behavior is taught just like anything else. If you are teaching your child that 2 plus 2 equals 4, you will correct their wrong answers immediately with the right answer. The same goes for misbehavior. Parents should correct their child’s improper behavior consistently and should then have their child practice the behavior they expect.
Teaching proper behavior begins as soon as your child exhibits improper behavior. Remember that they are constantly learning about their world. If you don’t correct their poor choices, they will grow up thinking that there is nothing wrong with how they behave.
Besides loving interaction, the number one need of all young children is stability and consistency. A child experiences a lot of stress if he or she feels there is no one they can depend on for safety and comfort and their behavior will reflect it. Even if a parent has to fake it, they should insure that their child feels secure. That’s why teachers see an inordinate amount of behavior problems from children that have no structure and predictable routine in their lives.
Good parenting requires a huge amount of time and effort. It follows life’s basic rule that the more you put into it, the more you will get out of it. Parents who put in the hard work while their children are small will not have to work nearly as hard when they are older. There is no easy way. If you try to take short cuts, you will see it reflected in your child.
©2010 raise a kid R.I.G.H.T.